Monday, October 29, 2007

Sounds like a good idea to me

Want to hear about my fantastically crappy day? Too bad, you’re going to anyway.

First of all, we get up this morning with a bunch of calls to make, not the least of which is to someone to get out here and to fix our well (more on that particular gem later). No phone service. Instead, I’m routed to Verizon’s financial office where I’m informed I have a $200 past due balance. Odd, since just last week I received a bill that said I had a $150 credit. Even more odd because as I checked our bank account, regular payments have been made for the past, oh five years or so.

I’m connected with a man named Ken. Except that I later learn that Man named Ken is really a woman named Kenisha or something of the like. (Note to Ken/Kenisha - you have a masculine voice. Very masculine. I'd suggest at least giving your full name and not shortening it to "Ken") He/she kept insisting that there was a balance due for the past three months. He/she didn’t really care that I’ve only had the phones for one month and that it's virtually impossible to owe three months worth of charges on phones that you have only had for a month. He/she did not care that I’ve paid Verizon every single month for the past five years. He/she did not care that I held a credit statement in my hand. Instead Man/woman named Ken apparently did not like my tone the least little bit because he/she kept putting me on hold to “calm down,” which only served to make me madder.

Long story short, they are trying to find the money my bank has been sending them and they have apparently been misdirecting into another account. And I now have phone service.

But I still haven’t figured out if he/she is really a woman or a man.

Problem number two wouldn’t actually BE a problem if my husband was 6’5” tall. But he’s not. Not even close. Nor am I. However, the seat of his Jeep apparently prefers a tall driver because it moved itself back all the way and now won’t move forward. It is, of course, electronic, so there’s no fooling it. There’s also no driving it since neither of us can reach the pedals. So for now, we are driving MY Jeep, which I was informed was a crapmobile. But at least we can reach the pedals.

Oh, and finally the well. You didn’t think I’d forget the well did you? How could I when I took a dirt shower this morning. We’ve moved from water/air to air/dirt. It’s fan-frigging-tastic to wake up to that in the morning. Ironically, our neighbors just came over to borrow some water (ha – the joke was on them as I handed them our mud mix we now call water!) because their well and/or pump isn’t working. Sounds like a dry well situation to me. It also sounds like money wooshing out of our bank account.

The only thing that can make me feel better at this point is to spend money we don’t have. On something fun. So tomorrow, we order the cabinets. Screw Verizon, the car, and the well. I'm getting new kitchen cabinets and you can't take that away from me.